Athletes are often told to stop getting down on themselves or to be more positive with themselves.  And they resist it.  They roll their eyes and the implicit message is, “I’ll be positive with myself when I do something to deserve it.”  But their logic is flawed.  Consider this; when you’re performing well and feeling good on the ice/the pitch/the course/the stage, do you need a positive voice in your head?  No.  You’re already where you need to be.  You’re already feeling how you need to feel to perform.  So when do we need that positive voice in our heads?  Right, when we’re not feeling how we need to.  When we’ve lost confidence; when we’re underperforming; when we’re frustrated; when we’re down.

So here’s how to get past that barrier.  Don’t think of you positive ‘I can do it’ voice as a reward; think of it as the WORK.  If you show up to compete and your legs are stiff, you don’t say, “oh well, I guess I have to compete with stiff legs”.  Of course not.  You warm them up and stretch them.  You do the work necessary to make them feel the way you want them to.  Treat your mind the same way.  If your confidence is low, do the WORK to elevate it.  If you’re discouraged, do the WORK to restore hope and optimism.

How we think affects how we feel; and how we feel affects how we perform.  So if you’re committed to your performance, use a positive voice in your head to guide how you feel.  Rather than treating it as a prize to be earned, treat it as a tool to feel how you want to feel.  Performance will follow.